Journalism or puppies

Ok, this is decision week. In about a week, this blog will likely take a turn from the desperate ramblings of a 3o-something bisexual who is not happy in the city where he lives to a blog about the excitement of taking a job in central Oregon for a newspaper that pays crap.

I've given this new job a chance. While I have morsels of happiness and hectic, challenging work - it's still what Dennis Leary calls a "chocolate chip cookie" - it's a brief moment of satisfaction in an otherwise unfulfilling day. However, I'm still not too sure if taking a job where the most exciting things I'll be covering are city council meetings and knitting clubs is the stuff worthy of sacrificing a job that pays enough for rent and possibly a car payment if such a need may arise.

Still, central Oregon is amazingly pretty.

But, if I stay in Omaha, there's the distinct possibility - no fact - that I would get a dog. Namely, this dog you see in the photo. And honestly, how the hell can you say "no" to that?

Unless, of course, if journalism is in your DNA and you can't scratch it out, regardless of the poverty that will become of such a profession. Not even the allure of a cute companion such as this may be enough to make me finally put away my attempt at becoming a journalist even in light of the fact that there's going to be a few thousand new journalism grads who will scrape this job up in a heartbeat, regardless of its meager wage in the heart of one of the most expensive places to live in the U.S.


So, what is it, readers?

Journalism or puppies?

Confidence boost

Two weeks before my roommate leaves, I get a call from a position that I applied for in Albuquerque. One of the recruiters is in Omaha tomorrow. The only thing is that we are looking at approximately 15 inches of snow. Would look sorta awkward going into my company with a scaled down suit when I came in today with jeans since I knew it was going to be sloppy.

I'm nervous because this may be my final shot in getting out of here. But I'm pumped because talk about a coincidence - a recruiter for the southwest in Omaha - during a snowstorm.

Scary...

But tomorrow, it looks like we're going to be snowed in. I burned a day's work onto CD so I could work from home (or at least at the coffee shop right next to my apartment).
But if there's no work, that means I can indulge in what will basically be my ideal snowday - which means...

- Not setting my alarm, but still getting up early.
- Making an omlette, brewing a pot of Tucson, Arizona-based Raging Sage Coffee and listening to NPR (specifically This American Life) while working.
- Doing laundry at 2 p.m. while listening to a few CDs - thus getting laundry done now instead of after work.
- Finding time to play about 30 minutes of video games.
- Getting into a snowball fight.
- Running my sister's dogs (one is a Samoyed who is in seventh heaven right now) through a few snow drifts.

For the sake of momentum

Before I get into this, just wanted to extend a major endorsement for Neko Case's new album, Fox Confessor Brings the Flood. I initially thought it was nowhere near the quality of Blacklisted. But it's more varied, and while Blacklisted will always be a favorite, this new one is growing on me in a big way.

So, I was listening to the fat man today for a hate fix (the same reason I watch about ten minutes of Saved by the Bell before work every morning). He went off on this odd rant that *gulped* actually made a glimmer of sense: Manly men take risks. Well, he's full of shit. I know a ton of women who take huge risks every day - be it standing up against religious extremism in countries or leaving their abusive husbands or simply dumping a high-paying job to move to an area they love and working at a Target until a job that fits their talents comes to fruitation. But I have to admit, it got me thinking of my situation.

How my indecisiveness to even choose a gender to be attracted to may also be affecting other parts of my life, like trying to get out of Omaha. I just looked at a cost of living/housing analysis and Albuquerque came near the top. I've always wanted to check out that city. And if Tucson doesn't pan out, I'm giving Albuquerque a serious thought.

But the moment I am about to leave the company I am at now, I get a huge assignment that is rewarding, exciting - a good shot of adrenaline. Dammit, make up your mind.

True to my credit, I am doing something about it. I just got a call from Tucson. They are looking for an editor.

That is good.

But they are relocating to Phoenix.

That is bad.

Well, it's down to two...

I came home tonight after working a ten-hour shift at my new job. My head's full of Sudafed/Wal-itin and god knows what else (some other generic form of Benadryl). I realized I can't stand living here - if not just for the allergies. So, I busted out a few applications for the University of Arizona as my iPod was downloading Iron Maiden's Live After Death, The Chemical Brothers' Push the Button, Wire's Pink Flag and Verve (the compilation that pits the DJs of today with legends of the past - such as Sarah Vaughan).

So - it's up to either Tucson or central Oregon to get me out of here in a month. I'm not telling any of my friends because I'm tired of making false threats. I'm one of many in my circle who constantly laments about the lack of opportunities there is in this city, but unless there is some major action in the form of a move, bitching about it is as futile as a request for Yo La Tengo on a Saturday night at the Max (a gay midwestern bar with loud, pulsating music).

Decent story from Yahoo -
http://news.yahoo.com/s/space/20060228/sc_space/thekeystohappinessandwhywedontusethem

Gotta keep movin' - movin' on - before it gets too much

I'm on my first vodka tonic after two beers. I feverishly tried to write this cover letter to this company in Tucson before the buzz took affect and sent my semi-intelligent over letter spiraling into a depressed, drunken, unfocused plea of "hire me! please, Jesus, just hire me!" Hope it went well.

I looked at homes in Omaha and quickly became depressed. Sure I can move into a home relatively easily with zero down payments for $555 a month. Then - I gotta save about two hundred a month for property taxes. Then additional utilities. Then - shit, I don't even want to know the costs of maintaining a home, yet alone a dog for companionship. So, it looks like escape is the way to go.

I've been listening to a lot of Luna lately. I love the sound - intense, moody, laid back and excessive. A few phrases keep lingering due to my situation...
"Gotta keep movin' - movin' on - before it gets too much."
"Say a prayer for you and me / say a prayer ... tell me do you miss me"
"It's true, you're lazy / you're tired and crazy / and you know there's something more / but you can't give it a name..."

Time is really starting to run out. I'm starting to feel boxed in with this city. As much as I like the new job and as much as I like the thought of traveling - it didn't change the fact that the moment I got back from traveling - when I sat in that cubicle, I felt like my shoulders were slumping forward, collapsing my body into a cocoon. A breakthrough has to happen...soon.

Reduce, reduce, reduce

I had a decent talk with a friend of mine about the moving situation. I figured it would take me approximately two grand to move. This includes a U-haul and a tow for my car. My friend took a no-s**t approach to the matter: how much is your stuff worth?

furniture? TV - bed, dresser. Probably not two grand. Maybe - but with depreciation value - nah, it's below. So... the answer is simple. Ditch everything. Have enough stuff to put in your car, strap your bike rack and go.

Still, that leaves one car load. And when you are single and you're in a situation where you want to move to another city, isn't everything about one car load? Think of it - you have to move - and instead of hauling a bunch of s**t around, you have one car load to haul your most meaningful possessions. The trunk - clothes most likely. CDs - the passenger side of your car. One box for books. One box for cooking stuff. And one box for 'files' (e.g. resume, clips, letters of recommendation, work samples, medical, insurance and school records). You have one car load, readers. What would you take?

Preemptive strike
The Comedy Central show 'Drawn Together' - that shit has got to go...