Friday, October 21, 2005

Hello, I'm here for the date -

While I was in Tucson, I tried to look up this girl I felt a connection with. She has since moved to Dallas Ft. Worth to be closer to family. So, I hunkered down in Epic Cafe and kept reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. This girl was sitting next to me, brown hair, with a neo-crunch vibe about her (e.g. hair messed up, but in a way that can only be messed up with the correct conditioners and a keen stylist). I asked her where to find a good place to eat and she directed me to this Vietnamese place where "absolutely nothing is heavy."

Fifteen minutes later, she pointed to my CD player and asked what I was listening to. I told her Neko Case. She knew who she was (bonus). However, she preferred a few other artists that are similar to Ms. Case, but I had absolutely no idea who they were (bigger bonus). Of course, I was due on a plane the next day, so that was it. A warm smile and that was it.

The next morning, I left, but I swung by Epic Cafe to get a caffeine jolt before I left. She was there and asked how dinner was. The dinner was exactly as she said - light, but memorable. No numbers were exchanged, or emails. It was just a good encounter.

I was chatting with this guy online. We were just talking about work. He bragged he had 500 CDs in his collection. Some good, mostly mediocre. Still, he seemed cool enough to at least possibly grab a cup of coffee with. We talked more - trying to get an angle for a coffee meeting without sounding desperate.

He asked what I did for work - I told him
He asked my stats - I told him (even though he saw a pic)
He asked if I worked out a lot - not in a flirting way, but as almost a prerequisite - I said 'yes'
He asked if I was hung - ...

... and the conversation buzz kill hits.

Yeah, yeah - I know the circumstances between these two encounters are as different as Kurt Vonnegut and Karl Rove. But chances are you're going to have these sorts of conversations with gay guys than straight gals. Maybe they're not different, it's just that most of the guys are less subtle in their approaches.

In this case - Ladies - 1 , Guys - 0

Preemptive strike

"Are you hung?" Do you really need to ask that? Find out for yourself, eventually! Trust your instincts. Use the force -


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